1. Manspreading & not paying attention

I was the first person into the tour van, sitting in the first row, the left most seat.  It’s a long seat, intended for 3 people.  The next guest sat in the right most seat, leaving the middle seat between us.  I am going to call him Fred.  No reason, but just because he needs a name.

As we picked up more people, most of the seats began to fill up, and the middle seat between us remained empty.  Why?  Because his camera bag and coat already occupied that seat.  Annoying, but I’ll let that slide.  Please note that I have a pretty large backpack and the largest North Face coat known to man.  But all of my stuff is contained within the boundaries of my left most seat.

Our guide, Thor, told us stories of the area and Fred loves Icelandic culture and history.  He’s very into these stories.  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that, but it’s as if he wasn’t paying attention!  He would continuously ask about things that Thor just said!  Like asking again and again and again to clarify.  Let’s be honest.  Nobody expects you to absorb all of this information and then go home and write a book about it.  But the level of questions Fred mounted to our guide… was astonishing.

2. Trying to steal my Northern Lights photos

Somewhere along the ride, I began speaking with two Aussies in the row behind us.  Low and behold, they were the Aussies that rescued me from the snow pit I fell into the night before!  So we were talking and chatting about the Northern Lights show and how our photos turned out.  Fred immediately interrupts and asks about my photos.  I have some on my phone, so I show them to him.  He says to me that his photos didn’t turn out right, because he couldn’t get the settings correct.  I sympathize.  I really do.  And then he asks me for my photos, which he adds the following line,

“I was there too.  I saw the same lights.”

-Fred, the awful tourist

That makes me think he will try to pass off my photos as his own.  And then even stranger, he wants the full file, not the one compressed to my phone.  I tell him I shot these files in RAW each photo is over 20 MB.  “That’s alright, I just want the full files.”  No, it’s not alright.  Even if I wanted to hand over my RAW files to you, which is odd, I can’t just email them to you.  What email server allows 40-80 MB files to be sent??  And no, I am not setting up any cloud based service just to share some photos to you.  Then, he says,

“Well can you make it bigger?  I don’t want the 1-2 MB files.  That’s too small.” 

Too small for what?  Blowing up the photo and pretending that it’s yours?

3. Dangerously prioritizing your phone charging

As we move along our tour in this winter wonderland, his phone battery drains.  Mostly because of the cold weather conditions, which drains battery life considerably.  He asks Thor if there is a place to charge his phone, while Thor is driving on the icy roads in Northern Iceland… So while driving, he hands Thor is cable and his phone and expects immediate charging.  Every time we stop, he needs his phone back.  Every time we get back into the van, he waits until Thor starts driving and hands his phone back to him.  No, our lives are not at risk driving on icy roadways.

4. Bread monster, i.e. the awful tourist

We arrived at the Myvatn Nature Baths, a sulfur, geothermic bath, which also had a small, but functioning cafeteria, for us to grab a bite to eat before we went into the baths.  With each order of soup, there should have been a complimentary bread roll that went along with it.  I was the first to buy my lunch, this $15 mushroom soup and banana.  When I went to the check out, the cashier asked why I didn’t want any bread.  She pointed to a bread basket in the corner.  I said there was no bread in there.  She excused herself for a moment to tell the kitchen to make more bread.

Now Fred, who is the last at everything (last one in the car, last one out – which usually pinned me inside)… Fred was the last to get his soup.  I was halfway through the soup by the time he sat down.  And immediately, you can hear him asking the cashier, “is the bread done yet, is the bread done yet?”  Obviously, they know they are missing bread.  Baking or heating up bread is not instantaneous.  A few minutes pass. 

“Is the bread done yet?  Because you know, my soup is getting cold.  What’s the point of having the soup if there’s no bread?” 

-Fred, the awful tourist

mmm…. there is a point.  I’ve finished my whole bowl of soup by now, and it was not lacking.  The bread finally arrives, and instead of being grateful, he says to the cashier, “I’m almost done with my soup now.”  How snarky, and obviously the mindset of an awful tourist. Let me tell you, the bread was warm and delicious and went just fine with my meal, post- soup.

5. Windows down in Northern Iceland

As we wound down the trip and drove back at sunset, Fred assumed the front passenger seat to take photos out the window.  He proceeded to roll down the window for extended periods of time, as we drove in freezing weather.  Talk about considerate for your fellow tour mates!  I was so cold, I asked Thor to turn up the heater.  And then, when I was STILL cold, since I am in the first row and the wind is blowing directly at me.  Fred had stopped taking photos, but the window was still open (in case there was an opportunity).  I finally asked him to close the window, as if it was the strangest request, the awful tourist begrudgingly obliged.  We all sat the rest of the time in silence, hoping there wouldn’t be another “are we there yet?” series of questions.

Watch this video on YouTube.

Parting Thoughts

Now remember, your fellow tour mates deserve to be respected too.  As does your tour guide.  How Thor fielded all these question with ease and grace, is the reason he is a tour guide, and I am not.  He did an amazing job.

As for me? I am just so grateful that I’ve only encountered such an awful tourist once in my life.

Lannie

Lannie is a perpetual wanderer and loves to share her travel adventures and the food she eats along the way with everyone.  She works during the day while bouncing around the world and dreams about new places and faces at night!  She has a home on the magical Isle of Islay in Scotland, where the whisky flows freely and happily.

Click on the blue icons below to follow her on social media!

lanniesfoodandtravel.com/index.php/about-me/

1. Overnight Bus from Yangon to Bagan

When we last left off, I had just gotten back to the hotel in Yangon for a quick shower and rest, before taking a taxi to the bus station.  I remember the hotel manager asking me a ton of questions about my bus, which bus company it was, what time it was leaving, the whole nine yards.  I was confused at the time. 

But when we were pulling up towards the bus station, I could tell why.  IT. WAS. ENORMOUS.  and had food stalls and little convenient store stalls.  There must have been over 100 different buses that left from that depot.  Now it made sense when the manager told me and the taxi driver to go to a specific place in the bus depot.  (I won’t call it a bus station anymore, because really, it felt like an outdoor market that happened to have buses going to and fro from it.)

After waiting a while in your stereotypical SE Asian bus waiting area, the bus left almost right on time.  I was going through my records to see if I could remember how much the bus cost.  It was maybe $20?  It was a “luxury VIP” bus, which meant it had nice reclining, leather chairs.  There was supposed to be wifi, but, well, Myanmar..  They gave us a bottle of water and a thick blanket, which was appreciated.  You never know with buses in Asia.  Could be roasting or frigid.  The bus was scheduled to arrive in Bagan around 5 am.

2. Arrival into Bagan

{Side note: I stayed at the Bagan Umbra Hotel.  As I was researching for this blog post, I was looking for the hotel name in my files.  I typed it into Google and I began looking at the photos.  It literally did not ring a bell at all.  I think I blocked a lot of this trip from my memory.  This is the first time I’m really thinking about it, or talking about it in any detail.}

On the way to the hotel, we were stopped at a checkpoint of some kind, to see if the taxi driver was carrying tourists.  Mind you, this is around 5 am.  And I had to promptly pay for my entry ticket into the archaeological, protected zone of Bagan.  I’ll let you make your own judgments about what that fee was all about.

I arrived at the hotel and immediately showered and slept.  At this point, I had a restless night on the bus, having spent all day walking around Yangon, with an early flight in from Singapore.  We are about 30 hours after I left Singapore, and I’m finally sleeping in a bed.

3. Motorbike Rental

I woke up around 10, just early enough to catch the tail end of breakfast.  And immediately, I set out on foot to see what was near by.  Low and behold, there is a little shop that rents motorbikes.  I don’t remember how much it cost, nor do I remember how long I had rented it for.

Anyway, I rented the thing and spent the morning zooming around town, going to different places.  It was so much fun.  The views, the locals around town.  And Bagan is just so scenic with it’s thousands of temples dotting the horizon.  Including these random ones that I stopped off at.

As I was driving around, I passed a sign that pointed to the archaeological zone of Bagan, this way.  And I thought of that fee I already paid.  So I turned off the main road, onto a sandy road towards the zone.  All of Bagan is pretty remote and spread apart, so I was lucky when the motorbike slipped on sand, that people were actually in the vicinity.  The motorbike slipped, I must have hit the breaks and all I know was that I landed on my face.  In the sand.  No helmet, of course not, it’s Myanmar.

Thankful for Good Samaritans

It’s a good thing people were around.  To at least help me up, pour some water on my face and help me wipe some of the blood away.  There were sand and rocks everywhere.  I could feel it still on my face.  The motor bike fared better with a broken head light and mirror.

The thing about traveling alone is that, I had no choice but to drive myself back to the hotel.  Think about it.  Bagan is a super remote place.  This sandy path I was on, I doubt had a name, and even if it did.  Could I describe it?  I wasn’t even sure I was really going to said archaeological zone to be honest, because I know I passed by a different sign on a paved road earlier on in the morning.

So not only did i have to drive back to the hotel, Old Bagan/New Bagan are connected to the main town, Nyaung-U, by two parallel streets.  One is bigger than the other, but big is relative.  I took the wrong one.

But.  Taking the wrong road did lead me to the pharmacy, where the owner and his wife kind of looked on at me in horror and proceeded to use iodine and alcohol to help me clean my wounds.  I’m truly thankful that these people were there to help.  And that I didn’t necessarily need words to communicate, because honestly, I was probably at a loss for words.

And then, I had to continue to drive myself back to the hotel.  What a nightmare that whole ordeal was.  I’d deal with the bike shop owner later time, and eventually pay them $50 for the damage.  I later found out that technically, they owed me money for the accident.. apparently that’s how Myanmar works.

4. The rest of the day

I don’t remember if I had already scheduled a Burmese massage beforehand or if I decided that was a good idea since I needed to relax afterwards.  And that’s when I realized my legs were bruised up too.  Anyway, I spent the rest of the day by the pool, sketching and drinking fresh fruit juices.  I remember ordering room service that night and watching Guardians of the Galaxy (1) on my tablet.  The next day, I had a photography, village walking tour with Three Treasures that I was really looking forward to. And that will be my story for next time.

Mini Public Service Announcement

But before I go, one quick story.  I had lunch with one of my friends earlier this year, let’s call him J, and I was telling him this story.  J’s college roommate is from Hawaii and apparently things like this happen all the time in Hawaii or Asia in general. Tourists come in, thinking it’ll be a great idea to rent a moped or motorbike to see the place, don’t know how to ride, don’t know the rules of the road, and definitely don’t have a helmet.  And then they get hurt. Public service announcement:  It’s super dangerous without a helmet.  I could have easily suffered more damage than I did.  And with no helmet?  It was inexcusable for me to lower my own safety standards just because Myanmar’s safety standards are lower.  Never again.  Be smart people.  And since I’m sure you’re all curious what I looked like post-accident:

I’m fine now.  Was just definitely in shock and a little banged up at the time.  I’m still figuring out this blog and it’s kinks.  I wanted to show a picture of my bruised legs, but for some reason that wouldn’t take.  Oh well.  You’ve seen legs.  These ones were just bruised.

Also, I’ll post again on my tour of Bagan that I took the following day, because it is definitely worth a dedicated post.  The guide was great and let us do things at my pace.

So remember, safety first.  And try not to be a dumb tourist… in any manner.

Lannie

Lannie is a perpetual wanderer and loves to share her travel adventures and the food she eats along the way with everyone.  She works during the day while bouncing around the world and dreams about new places and faces at night!  She has a home on the magical Isle of Islay in Scotland, where the whisky flows freely and happily.

Click on the blue icons below to follow her on social media!

lanniesfoodandtravel.com/index.php/about-me/